A divorce or separation is always difficult, but when there are children involved, it is especially hard.
Agreeing with an ex-partner on arrangements for your children after a break-up is a priority for both parents. Important decisions about your children’s care need to be made, including who they will live with and how much time they will spend with each parent.
However, with emotions running high, sitting down and having a calm and rational conversation with an ex-spouse about such matters can be easier said than done.
In this blog, our experienced Child Lawyers give their top tips on how to reach an agreement with an ex-partner over arrangements for your child.
What child arrangements do you need to make on divorce?
If your relationship ends and you have children, you and your ex-partner must agree on various arrangements relating to their care. These usually include:
- Living arrangements. Parents must decide where their child lives, which parent they will primarily reside with, and any arrangements for shared residency.
- Contact arrangements. An agreement must be reached about when your child spends time with each parent and how contact occurs. Sometimes, parents will also need to decide on contact with other individuals, such as grandparents or siblings. Special occasions, such as birthdays and holidays, should also be considered.
- Financial matters. In England and Wales, separated parents remain legally responsible for the financial costs of bringing up a child. Child maintenance is the regular financial support that goes towards a child’s everyday living costs and is paid by the parent who isn’t responsible for a child’s day-to-day care to the person who is. Parents can agree on child maintenance payments themselves or use the Child Maintenance Service (CMS).
- Other issues. Parents may also need to decide on other issues relevant to a child’s upbringing, such as their education, medical care and religious upbringing.
How do I agree on child arrangements with an ex-partner?
Separated parents have several options available to them to help reach an agreement about arrangements for their children on divorce, dissolution or separation.
Some of the most common ways of agreeing child arrangements with an ex-partner include:
- Privately between yourselves.
Negotiating with the other parent is the quickest, cheapest and most effective way to agree with an ex-partner over child contact and living arrangements.
If communication becomes strained, it can help to bear the following points in mind:
- Be open. Communicate positively and focus on the task at hand.
- Put your children first. Remembering that your children are your priority and you both have their best interests at heart can help keep conversations on track.
- Plan. School term dates are often released at least 12 months in advance, which can help long-term planning and eliminate any last-minute stress.
- Write it down. Record the details of what you have decided so that everyone knows what is happening and when.
- Get help if you need it. Numerous tools and services exist to help separated parents agree on arrangements and make a parenting plan.
- Mediation.
Even in the most amicable break-ups, it can be challenging for separated parents to agree on suitable arrangements for their children.
If you are struggling to reach an agreement between yourselves and think that negotiations would benefit from the input of an independent third-party, mediation is a good option.
Family mediation offers a non-confrontational environment where parties work together with the help of an independent, professional third-party to find mutually beneficial solutions. Mediation encourages collaboration and is cheaper, quicker and less stressful than going to court.
When parents reach an agreement, arrangements are formalised in a parenting plan and can be made legally binding by applying to the courts for a consent order.
At Bowsers Solicitors, protecting the needs and interests of your children is our priority.
Our experienced team abides by Resolution’s Code of Conduct, meaning we prioritise negotiation and mediation to resolve all matters. This helps to keep costs to a minimum, speed up the process and, in most cases, will make for a far more amicable situation.
If you have separated from your child’s parent and are struggling to agree on arrangements going forward, our experienced Child Law solicitors in Wisbech and March can help.
Our dedicated specialists provide legal advice to individuals and families across March, Wisbech and wider Cambridgeshire, Lincolnshire and Norfolk to assist in resolving children’s matters whilst protecting their best interests.
To speak to one of our friendly child law solicitors and chartered legal executives today call 01945 583194 (Wisbech) or 01354 652606 (March), or email reception@bowsers.co.uk. Alternatively, you can fill in our contact form.
- Going to Court.
Even with the best will in the world, it is sometimes not possible for separated parents to agree on arrangements for their children. If you’ve tried other suitable options and still can’t agree, it may be necessary to go to court.
Going to court can be expensive and can take a long time. It may increase conflict between you and the other parent and can be stressful for everyone involved.
Leaving the court to decide on arrangements also means that a judge will impose a decision on you that is legally binding, meaning you might not get what you want.
Read more about what parents can do to agree arrangements for their children here.
Child Law Solicitor Near Me
Bowsers Solicitors have been working with families for many years in various matters, including contact matters, residence, parental responsibility and more specific issues.
Our experienced team abides by Resolution’s Code of Conduct, meaning we prioritise negotiation and mediation to resolve all matters. With this, we do all we can to avoid the family court. This helps to keep costs to a minimum, speed up the process and, in most cases, will make for a far more amicable situation.
We always recommend seeking legal advice at an early stage in the dispute. However, even when this happens, family court is not always avoidable. Nevertheless, we have the means to support you through the court process and will do all we can to achieve a favourable outcome.
If you are looking for child law advice, please contact our experienced family solicitors and chartered legal executives today on 01945 583194 (Wisbech) or 01354 652606 (March), or email reception@bowsers.co.uk. Alternatively, you can fill in our contact form.
